Looking for a more natural, effective healing for your CPTSD?
What is CPTSD Trauma?
Trauma results from any event that overwhelms our capacity to cope. CPTSD trauma is from prolonged exposure to trauma. The common ingredient is helplessness. When our capacity to defend ourselves is not successful, and we experience prolonged fight, flight, or freeze hormones (cortisol overload in the body) the unreleased survival energies stay stuck in our nervous system. If we do not release this energy from our nervous system where it is stuck, we develop anxiety and panic and other psychosomatic and behavioral problems.
Trauma affects us physically, changes our behaviors, intensifies our emotions, and transforms our entire psyche. Doctors and PhDs who study the effects of trauma in the body such as Bessel van der Kolk, among others concur that trauma resides in the body and not with the event. Trauma is locked in the body as incomplete survival responses resulting in dysregulation in the autonomic nervous system long after the developmental time has ended. Trauma is more common than we think. In fact, anything that is ‘too much, too fast, and too soon’ has the capacity to leave a mark within our body, mind, and soul energy.
Causes and sources of trauma are:
Abandonment, birth trauma, bonding break with a parent, consistent criticism, judgment, experiencing violence, rape, abuse, incest, sexual molestation, accident, bullying, surgery, medical and dental, divorce, death of a loved one, war, suicide of a loved one, forced emigration, prolonged illness, torture, accidents and falls, natural disasters, car accidents, narcissists, distress, or any experience that causes a threat to someone’s life. Now, couple this with too much time developing in it, the feeling of not being able to escape, or merely having guilt and shame for wanting to escape the attachment that was formed...AND YOU HAVE CPTSD!!
In fact, any incident where we feel that we can’t cope, that we're going to die, wish we could just die, or are in constant danger is traumatic. Our body will naturally go into fight/flight/freeze in order to survive. From developmental trauma to PTSD, trauma severely affects our nervous system, our beliefs, and how we react to our emotions. When trauma gets stuck in the body for a period of time, symptoms begin to show.
Anxiety, panic attacks, phobias, feeling disconnected and detached, feeling isolated and alone, depression, helplessness, hypervigilance, hyperactivity, mood swings, weight gain, insomnia, nightmares, physical pain, chronic fatigue, dissociation, reduced ability to deal with stress, compulsive behaviors, broken relationships, inability to attach, and SOOOOO much more.
While many healing modalities treat only the symptoms, it is important to go to the root cause of the issue and complete the understanding of trauma for true healing and FREEDOM from the body's reactions to happen. This is where Dezi specializes her Intimacy Life Coaching sessions and Tantra Mentoring for the most expedient healing. She tries to get to the healing part before the body becomes diseased or an autoimmune disorder begins. She knows first hand how prolonged exposure to cortisol hormones not only wreaks havoc on the body but believes CPTSD is the basis for most substance abuse AND the reason for the increase in our mental health crisis in the last decades!
Even if a traumatic event is not sexual in nature, it can inhibit our sexual expression because our emotions reside in that area of our energy body (sacral chakra). When the body is in fear it is likely to affect our sexual functioning. Therefore, someone may not have experienced rape or sexual abuse, yet still, feels the need to heal trauma in the body in order to have a happy sex life or emotional relationships. Tantra is proven to be very healing in the emotional chakra because of how it balances energies body, mind, and soul! (Remember, Tantra is thousands of years old...why? Because when something works, it never goes "out of style". It will even suffer scrutiny, judgment, misinformation, and taboo...but still survive why? Because the truth always stays, lies never can.)
Trauma affects our sexuality which leads to sexual dysfunctions as:
Men: Erectile dysfunction, impotence, premature ejaculation, performance anxiety, low sex drive, fear of intimacy
-Hyper-sexuality: addicted to sex, porn, sexual fantasies, compulsive and obsessive
-Hypo-sexuality: no sex drive at all, avoid sexual connections, fear of intimacy
Women: Period pain, fertility issues, loss of interest in sex, vaginismus, anti-orgasm, painful sex, and more...
Clients with Sexual Trauma can also have the following symptoms:
Dissociated, numb, cold, shutdown, feel fear, guilt, shame, mistrust, overwhelmed, feel violated, no boundaries, feel dirty, feel not worthy, helpless, hopeless, suicidal. Sexual trauma can erode a person’s self-confidence, self-esteem, the ability to trust self and others, the inability to set clear boundaries, the potential to experience real intimacy and an understanding of appropriate sexual behavior and healthy sexuality.
How do we heal sexual trauma?
Stephen Porges, author of Polyvagal theory, brings scientific evidence that the symptoms of trauma are biologically established. The Polyvagal Theory is a new understanding of how our nervous system works and explains trauma responses and the very essence of social behavior. He states there are 3 branches of the autonomic nervous system:
Social engagement – Connection, compassion, feeling, self-soothing, love, and attachment
This knowledge helps us to understand how trauma symptoms manifest as well as how to help to heal them. Dezi's Golden Touch Tantra sessions are designed to heal one on all three levels (Body, Mind, and Soul).
Due to the fact that our body will literally try to shut out the traumatic experience (protective response), the normal ability to feel both external and internal sensation becomes limited or shut down. This can get worse as we age because of stacking and the bodies progression towards cellular breakdown.
Re-activating the ability to feel sensations is the key to healing trauma...and what Tantra is all about. This is NOT always what one wants as some are conditioned to believe "being strong is not showing weakness" but it is this very baby-boomer tough love parenting/authoritative view that's contributed to the decline of "coping" in the last few decades. AND, this was actually designed because money is made when an individual needs medical and pharmaceutical care. Studies now show that STRONGEST humans are those willing to be vulnerable, feel emotions (human nature), and get trauma OUT OF THE BODY.
Unresolved trauma seeks expression through restless legs, headaches, backaches, clenched jaws, flashbacks, bad dreams, anxious thoughts, and countless other outlets. Using trauma-informed therapy like Tantra that includes mind-body-soul practices, has (for thousands of years) proven to support the healing process. Healing results when the client feels empowered to release the protective body and mind armors safely, and finally be free.
To heal trauma and come back to our nature, we must go to our nature. Tantra is nature whereas porn is man-made and was invented in the 1500's to "control" the masses. The good news now is trauma healing does not always have to be a long and painful process. It does not require hours of talking therapy, medication, or being re-traumatized by recalling memories over and over. Tantra is still loyal to healing as it was over 10,000 years ago. Since trauma leads to a disconnection with the physical body, it is important to adopt practices that can connect the person back to the body. Tantra is that very embodied practice!!
How can Golden Touch Tantra sessions heal trauma?
Tantra is a spiritual path that takes a person from thinking (too much mind) to feeling (balance body, mind, soul), basically from stuck to freedom, from contraction to expansion if you will.
Golden Touch Tantra offers a way to dissolve shame and guilt around sexuality and to embrace the body's natural ways of feeling pleasure and joy to facilitate trauma release of CPTSD symptoms quicker then other types of modalities.
It is a way to develop more self-love and greater self-esteem and offers techniques to heal all kinds of sexual dysfunction and trauma stuck within the body's systems.
After a traumatic experience, changes happen on a physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual level. Golden Touch Tantra addresses all levels within one healing program, is self-paced, and lasts! It is natural, so if nature is more your speed these days, than you've found your new freedom!
BODY * MIND * SOUL
Physical - Trauma gets trapped in the physical body! Tantra helps through safe touch, breathwork, movement, body massage (yoni & lingam for advanced sessions), energy/tsubo release, and de-armoring leading to TRUST...
Emotional - Trauma makes a person overwhelmed with emotions (fear, guilt, shame, anger, grief, etc.). Tantra helps through emotional release and freedom
Mental - Trauma affects the brain. Limiting beliefs incorrectly used to help us feel safe are replaced with truth. Tantra helps with rewiring the brain, adopt empowering beliefs, and adopting a new "processing" that feels natural
Spiritual - A traumatized person feels fragmented, disconnected, and incomplete. Tantra brings love, wholeness, and proper self- connection so secure attachments can be formed with the right individuals on your life journey
Golden Touch Tantra sessions bring wholeness to the physical, emotional, mental and spiritual energies within you. The intention is to integrate deep healing from the challenged or traumatized and replace imprisoning beliefs with love, acceptance, attention, and acknowledgment.
When working with both trauma and sexual energy it is essential to move slowly and not to overwhelm the client’s system. This is the paramount in Golden Touch Tantra. Dezi designs each client's session for them, ensuring that the client has sufficient self-awareness and the ability to self-regulate his/her nervous system without becoming overwhelmed by the feelings and sensations that may arise in their session. With the client's consent, techniques, and rituals (like touch, breath, sound, and movement) are used to help them to feel their emotions and body more deeply (even half-way around the world). Feelings, sometimes uncomfortable, will emerge and are absolutely appropriate, such as emotional pain, grief, sadness, anger, rage, or fear that are the result of blocked emotions that have not been fully felt and released from the body.
Tools, techniques, and rituals are used in Golden Touch Tantra (distance) sessions to release trauma:
Safety & Trust
Feeling safe is key in tantric healing. The process of Golden Touch Tantra sessions is to firstly, make the body a safe place again. Only when the client feels safe and relaxed in their skin, will healing begin. It is important to Dezi that clients feel safe with her and feel open, honest, and trusting of the tailored sessions
In Golden Touch Tantra, Dezi presents a Right Brain/Left Brain practice when recollection and past trauma patterns arise. This brings about acceptance and healing instead of re-traumatizing and allows for the body to then release the stuck symptoms
Consent, Boundaries, and Code of Ethics
Before Golden Touch Tantra sessions begin, Dezi discuss various methods of her work and provides intake paperwork so both sides feel safe, protected, and empowered. Clarity is key because it takes away the fear of the unknown. It is important to work with consent. Consent is permission and agreement and VERY important in this day and age. When we receive what we ask for, no more and no less, we begin to trust...healing begins with trust. Learning to establish boundaries is part of the healing process as well. The most efficient way to restore intimacy and healthy sexuality in a person whose boundaries were not respected is through understanding their boundaries NOW. Apart from working with consent and strong boundaries, it is also important to know a person's code of ethics or how they conduct themself. Dezi provides her ethics and morals during intake, as well as discusses the client's, so that all parties can relax and feel safe
Breathing disperses emotional pain. PERIOD. It is SO incredibly important, especially in our shallow-breathing lifestyles. Deep breathing stimulates the vagus nerve which calms the mind. It increases oxygen and energy flow in the body, helps gently release toxins, negative thoughts, inner stress tension, suppressed wounds, painful emotions, and trapped trauma within. Many don't know this but a deep breath also affects dopamine, oxytocin, and serotonin within the brain and actually gives ones the very control to heal themselves at any moment they choose! It's the beginning and ending to all thoughts, law-of-attraction, successful bonding, tantra, and all things body. Breath is the most magical medicine we forget we control!
Sounds and vibration disperse physical pain. Sounds activate the throat chakra where as during trauma most people freeze and had been silenced. Just releasing sound on your exhale can move us leaps and bounds towards healing. Dezi always incorporates vibrational healing within sessions!
Feel, Deal, Heal
One of the easiest ways to let go of muscle tension is to actively feel and let go of emotions when they come to you. Saving things for later (as we've been conditioned) or brushing them off to be strong is the fastest way to weaken the psyche. "Feel, deal, heal now so there's no suffering later" is huge in Dezi's world. The healing is in the feeling, not the denying, escaping, suppressing, and NEVER in the easy out of numbing. Dezi helps you to feel and express without going in overwhelm. This is created with new self-regulating tools and rituals that work for YOU!
When a body experiences a trigger, surprise, shock, shame, or guilt and doesn't know what the proper response is for it, all of the powerful energy that was ready to fight or flee gets trapped into the body in "freeze". In nature akn animal knows to shakes this off as soon as the danger has passed, but humans have lost this natural instinct to shake off excess adrenal (cortisol) energy after danger has passed. We have a tendency to try to be strong by blocking this effect and this is the very response that creates trauma in the body! ALLOWING adrenal responses, accepting that we do this, breathing and "showing up for yourself" instead of believing we're a failure, frees the body from tension, contractions, panic, anxiety, and blockages thus allowing blood as well as sexual energy to flow freely through the body chakras (energy cylinders) creating a body that heals instead of prepares for disease and pain.
Since trauma can immobilize the body and then the person, freezing him/her in a state of arousal and fear, tantra movements have been proven to restore mobility, especially in the emotional centers of the body. Movement increases self awareness, ability to focus on the present moment, the ability to heal the past, and prepares us for all that life can throw at us. Dezi finds where in the body a client is blocked or challenged and gives the movement tools needed to heal. Tired of that low back pain every week for unexplained reasons? Golden Touch Tantra movement will shock you!
As a result of trauma, most people feel dissociated and lose their connection with their own bodies. In the body, there are areas of numbness, pain, and pleasure. The first step is to allow this awareness. Now, if you don't like orgasm, then sadly Golden Touch antra is not the program for you. It is only by un-numbing parts of the energetic body that true healing can begin. When we feel comfortable in our body, we develop the capacity to be fully present to physical experiences, develop healthy mental sexuality, and REALLY heal sacred parts within. Orgasm is the most powerful energy the body can muster and was given to us for a reason, thats why we are told not to self-pleasure as children or teased away from all things sexual until authority around us deems it appropriate. Can you imagine how the world would be if we were allowed to know our healing power was within? How can they profit off healed, balanced humans? Is there more money in mental-illness, medication, porn addiction, and such...or the sick? Hmmmm...
Touch is an important part of life, infact we need it to survive! Touch is proven very nurturing, healthy, and loving. Infants who are not touched enough tend to have more illness or death. When we learn to touch with unconditional love and healing intention, we start to heal the deeper parts of ourselves that have been waiting for this level of nurturing communication. Proper touch must be taught and is the most direct way to bring connection, love, and flow to disconnected areas of the body, mind, AND soul. Dezi is a registered massage therapy instructor and is an expert on touch. Yes, there are wrong ways that you are touched in your life and may not even know it. Learn the easiest way to heal through Golden Touch Tantra! Through safe touch, we work directly with trauma. You may have never thought of this or been told, but sexual energies are powerful energies that are spread all over the body to release trauma and r-awaken every cell. Now, what would happen if you were developing new, healed cells? What if you were the one controlling the development of your new, healed cells? Hmmm...
The armor is a result of blockages created by trauma, tension, thought-patterns, processing, and different experiences throughout life. This armor can hinder life-force from flowing freely throughout the body. It hardens and de-sensitizes the physical body. The process of de-armoring is a way to open up and release. It's the hardest, yet best thing that will ever happen to you. To understand the discomfort, we liken it to you being asked to give up the beliefs that your god wants you to suffer and instead believe that you are loved so much that suffering isn't supposed to even be involved. Feels weird right? But, what if you were told to believe something that really isn't working for you? What if everything you want is on the other side of the beliefs someone told you to believe? If you were given a soul that knows subconscioulsy what to do, knows how to give you signs and signals for what is right and wrong, but man gave you beliefs that are working against you, is it time to de-armor and live free? Hmmm...
As an infant, we are often born into extreme unconditional love, and then...somehow we are taught to reject loving ourselves and live in the "not good enough" way that 97% of all humans find themselves. In Golden Touch Tantra, Dezi guides clients back to their "good enough" foundation and requires a Healthy Selfish lifestyle in order to create lasting change and CPTSD healing. It is proven that if we do not make ourselves a priority, the universe won't either. You can love yourself and be an amazingly, balanced and healthy, non-narcissistic human being! It requires unconditional love for oneself first...then allowing the overflow (from your filled cup) to reach others. It requires giving up co-dependence and adopting inner-dependence. It is a muscle we must build...
This, self-care, is linked with unconditional love as well. Since traumatized people are known to lose connection with themselves, they very rarely look after themselves. They may feel resistent around making self-care a priority. Self-care practices like grounding, meditation, exercise, Tantra, breathing, movement, and the like may have been presented as "woo woo" or "weird" but that is often because they work and money cannot be made off of healthy people. A daily practice of self-care is much easier than "waiting" for time and money for a vacation. In Golden Touch Tantrs, Dezi begins to teach the importance of life developing into a life one needs no vacation from!
Tantric healing is transformational and can bring back connection to the real "us", others, bodies and our Universal source. Trauma can be resolved with Tantra. If you've experienced trauma, you don’t have to live with it in your body or impacting your daily life anymore. There is hope. By finding a trauma-informed coach, mentor, or partner and embracing the full scope mind/body/soul healing, you will be guided along the path towards resolving and releasing your trauma and live a life of bliss! Do you really think your were meant to live a life of trauma? Or were you shown trauma so that you would fight for the life you deserve? Contact Dezi now. Life is too short to be unhappy. You ARE enough and you deserve a life free of CPTSD and trauma.